Friday, September 20, 2019

Romancing into our dotage -- light the fire of romance after tragedy

Happy in Barcelona, taking a chance on love. 
Excited to be touring New York City together.

Love is lovelier the second time around
Just as wonderful with both feet on the ground
It's that second time you hear your love song sung
Makes you think perhaps that love, like youth, is wasted on the young

--Sammy Cahn and Jimmy Van Heusen


WHEN MY SECOND husband passed, I was still in my fifties.
Sad, confused and in mourning, I circled the wagons, looking at convent brochures. Perhaps I would sequester myself in a yurt in some remote village.  My belongings would be a spoon, a bowl, a single painting, a dozen books and a hair shirt.  I would be the world's first penitent comedienne because I would also take my sense of humor.
My sister Robbie giggled, "You are NOT -- definitely NOT -- convent material. "You still have 20 good years of travel, maybe more."
Enjoying Amsterdam with its historic windmills.
She coaxed me back into the world of dating and after a half-dozen disasters, I met by chance Bruce William Keller. While I was twice widowed, he was three years out of divorce, recovering from a near fatal car crash and an unhappy marriage.
In Sweden on a Baltic trip last week,
touring on an electric bus.
I SHARE OUR story to encourage others to take that chance.  Ladies, put yourselves out there.  There are so many wonderful LIVING, LOVING, LIFE GOES ON
ways to meet like-minded people --
book clubs, dance classes, theaters and concert halls (perhaps volunteer as an usher). Gents:  the same advice goes for you.  You may wonder "What if she turns me down?"  But what the hell; ask. What's the worst that can happen?
Looking forward to the future and relishing the present. Cookie and Keller
just returned from a month on the Baltic.  What if they'd never met?
When we cruise, which we love doing, we attend the on-board trivia contests and art classes during the at-sea days.  We also book a table for four or six rather than dining at a table for two. We've met many lovely friends around the world this way.
Of course, as with all things, one must put oneself out there.
MY BEST advice, having chosen not to enter the convent, is to be yourself, continuing to nurture your passions and look for someone who shares them. If you desire companionship -- someone to travel with, see a play or movie with, enjoy a dinner, hike or sports event, don't delay. Carpe diem.  Tempus fugit.
As Bobby McFerrin suggests, "Don't worry.  Be happy."

Autumn blankets the West Fork of the Stillwater River,
a serene place in south-central Montana.

UP NEXT:  Autumn around the world. Known as fall in the U.S. and Canada because of the shedding of leaves from deciduous trees, it's a magical time, the favorite of poets and artists and the two of us. We take you to some of our favorite fall corners of the world where the leaves drop and colors change from green to light yellow, deep gold, orange, crimson and deep red – inspired by a natural process. We share a few of our favorite fall quotes too, as we remember to explore, learn and live.  Catch us each Friday for a fresh take on travel, the arts, nature, family and more at 


  1. What a wild ride and fun you have had. May it continue.

  2. Lovely pep talk to those of us who just crawled back into a cave. Thanks for the encouragement.

  3. So much fun to read your story. What a lucky guy and girl to have found one another. May your happiness continue.